DaRK oNe ZeRo - The Dark Side

I re-upped on my original piece of dark, twisted poetry with this. Must have been another fucked up day, cause like before, I really don’t remember writing this. Weed’s a helluva drug.

I think I’ll never know why I still hide
behind my false sense of pride that’s inside
all these feelings I feel that are so unreal
and the sad thing is I can’t fucking deal
with the shit that’s going on inside me,
and I still feel so helpless despite ne
because I can’t fucking sleep at night.
I’m still so confused and scared that I might
end up never being able to rest
at all for days and days on end unless
all the stupid assholes on earth will die,
I hate those people who live life a lie.
Those dipshits are the ones who need to feed
off of greed, they don’t even want to see
what real life is about, and there’s no doubt
that all these assholes do is whine and pout
about how they never seem to have enough cash
when what they actually do is stash
their grass that they constantly confide in,
and I know I’m not lyin’ because I’m
still restless every time I try to sleep.
I’m still hoping that I won’t fall too deep.
But all those thoughts are running through my brain
they’re all the same, all driving me insane
and I’ll still be restless at night tonight,
‘cause I can still feel the ropes getting tight
on my neck, unable to address this
hopelessness of me still being restless.
My body hurts, my mind is on the edge.
I feel like I’m standing on a ledge
looking down, thousands of feet to the ground
ready to drop and stop without a sound.
It feels like knives going into my skin,
a hopeless addiction that I can’t win
and my mind is on the verge of collapse
but at any time, it can all relapse
right back to the start, back into my heart;
all of this shit is tearing me apart
because all of this weed and ecstacy
has ripped it’s black claws deep inside me,
but I need them to go on everyday
and this hopeless habit won’t go away.
I know that my life is forever changed,
and I’m sure that I will end up derranged
but maybe this is how it’s meant to be.
Or maybe god is just fucking with me.